between Saturday and Sunday saw several movies, but most wanted to see was Interview with the Vampire and Avatar, both very good movies ^^...
I leave this article, which in my view applies to any relationship is homosexual, lesbian or heterosexual ^^.... Although it went well when I saw it was not a Christian site, but just as interesting ...
Capricho "True Love or Temporary?
" "How I can know if I'm really in love ?" Asked a reader of a newspaper columnist. The answer was: " If you have to ask is because you are not ."
The inadequacy of that response is tremendous, there are many who still believe that when love hits you will realize instantly. Actually that's not so easy.
A survey revealed that on average people feel crushes passenger six or seven times and only once or twice real love. Probably you have experienced in the romances you have lived. But the big question is:
How do you know if this is true love or just a passing infatuation or passion?
Love and infatuation have similar symptoms
Love and infatuation are such thing in common: strong feelings of affection for someone, which complicates the attempt to establish the differences, since many of the symptoms resemble each other. The most passionate and blind infatuation may have some characteristics of true love and vice versa. The difference between love and infatuation are rather degree. Accordingly, it should consider all the evidence carefully.
love and infatuation shared by three symptoms: passion, desire for closeness, and strong emotions.
Passion:
Passion can arise without true love. In the case of man, particularly, he can be passionate or strong sexual feelings for a woman he never knew. The kisses and caresses bold increase the urgency of the erotic sensations commands until sex relationship. The passion alone is not an indicator of true love. Sexual attraction can be so urgent in these cases as in true love, and sometimes can become dominant. Love must be based on more than a sexual attraction or passion.
Besides, nobody can keep such a fierce passion for a long time, but said otherwise. If all that a couple share is passion, this relationship probably end in a few months. If a couple decides to marry on the basis of this maelstrom of sexual motivation, will soon learn that when the passion dies there is nothing to keep them together.
desire for closeness:
The continued desire to be near each other can be so overwhelming passion and true love. The desire to be together all the time cause separation anxiety and can produce a feeling of emptiness and loneliness in the absence of the loved one, but this is not necessarily an indicator of true love. The desire to be close can have the same intensity of passion and true love.
Thrills:
Studies haveconfirmado que al comienzo de un simple enamoramiento se experimentan síntomas físicos distintivos. Así por ejemplo, sentirse sobre nubes cuando todo va bien o sentirse enfermo cuando las cosas andan mal; una corriente helada que corre por la espalda, falta de concentración, malestar estomacal o inapetencia. Pero tales emociones se manifiestan tanto en el enamoramiento caprichoso como en el amor real, si bien son más indicativas del primero El verdadero amor incluye algo más que una mezcla de sentimientos frívolos y se extiende más allá del agotamiento de las emociones fuertes.
Si sientes soledad, aburrimiento, o estás en el proceso de olvidar un broken romance, you're more willing to interpret as real love other romance to emerge, if only it is a little more than infatuation. If you feel unsure to or have low self-esteem, you should exercise caution. People mature and normal self-esteem can also be caught by the passion, but are better able to recognize it.
not believe that passion is something totally negative. It can be a pleasurable experience whenever you recognize for what it is, a brief interlude of romantic fantasy. Giving enough time or will result in an actual relationship that involves much more than a flood of emotions. Recalls also that some relationships that start in passion turn into true love when they are tested over time.
True love infatuation differs because it gives time and space to acknowledge both the good qualities as a person's imperfections. Establishing a compromise and have sex, go live, or marrying someone on the basis of those feelings is nonsense premature and certainly produce negative results.
Identify what is real
In 1820, during the gold rush seekers so often confused with pyrite. Pyrite, or fool's gold, as it does to call this mineral is detected in a saucepan on the stove. While Sears and smokes produced a very unpleasant smell. By contrast, the heat does not damage the real gold nor produces odor. Unfortunately, you can not put your relationship in a pan on the fire to see if it produces a bad smell, but you can analyze it through these nine factors:
1. Love develops slowly, the infatuation quickly.
The Most people think that love is a sudden and intense emotion. Carlos said: "I was excited the minute I saw her. It was like I always imagined it. I feel as if I had known all your life. "
Carlos assessment is not valid until after a year of dating. Why? For love is growing and that growth takes time. It is impossible to know the real person in just a few games. At the beginning of a relationship, all show the best behavior. Hide or repress unpleasant traits. It takes months to see a person in various situations and to know it well. Many know hide the negative features of his personality even after marriage.
Do not rush to conclusions. Let your relationship grow. Start the friendship and do not try to rush during the stage of knowledge. The early peaceful engagements are part of the welcome. Such friendships can lead to true love, which is similar to passion in intensity but is rooted in reality.
2. Love is based on compatibility, infatuation, chemistry and appearance.
Esteban feels "cool" when he meets a pretty girl. Thinks it's "chemistry" snapshot. "What feel or not feel. I felt it the minute I saw. " Where did that chemical that Esteban and love are the same thing? The film, perhaps!
Relying on "chemistry" to take you love is stupid and dangerous. The chemistry is based mostly on physical attraction or sexual. There has to be that spark that makes you feel more vital than ever, but basing a marriage that's just absurd.
may feel a strong attraction to someone you just met and that you like everything, but there is a long way to go before love that person. True love involves chemical but draws on other factors such as character, personality, emotions, ideas and attitudes. He who is in love is interested in how the other person thinks and responds in different situations, or the values \u200b\u200bthey share. Must observe their attitudes toward issues such as religion, family, sex, money and friendships and mutual interests, his past and his manners. The more you have in common, the better the chance of real love.
3. Love focuses on a person, the infatuation may include several.
A passionate can think of "love" to two or more people at once. Such people often differ markedly in personality. Ana recognized to be in love with two boys and could not decide on one of the two. Esteban is mature, stable and responsible, while Sergio is irresponsible, fun-loving and spender. Ana really not in love with none. Something fun propels the spender, while his instincts tell him mature qualities are more important Esteban. Finally combines the qualities of both and think you're in love with them. True love focuses on a person whose character and personality exhibit qualities essential, but never combines several individuals to form an ideal.
4. Love produces safety infatuation, insecurity.
Love is based on the principle of mutual trust while falling in love can cause insecurity and try to control the other through jealousy. This does not mean that when one is truly in love never feel jealous, but will be less frequent and severe. True love trust. Some people are flattered to believe that jealousy is evidence of a true love, but these inequalities reflecting unhealthy feelings of insecurity, low self-esteem and desire for possession. Real love does not work that way.
5. Love recognizes the reality ignores infatuation.
True love sees the problems in perspective, without minimizing its seriousness, while the crush ignores the social, ethnic, educational or religious. Sometimes even gets involved with someone already married and assumes that such issues are not important. By contrast, a pair connected by true love faces problems frankly and when a problem threatens their relationship openly discuss it and solve it intelligently. Negotiated solutions in advance.
6. Love motivates positive behavior, the infatuation has a destructive effect.
Love is constructive and encourages the best of you, provides you with new energy, ambition and interest in life. Stimulates creativity and encourages personal development, improvement, and all that is positive. This naturally engenders feelings of self-esteem, confidence and self-confidence and motivation to succeed. Studying with interest, you plan more effectively and save more diligently. To your adds life purpose and meaning. Although daydream, you stay within the limits of reality and features to your highest level.
The infatuation has a destructive and disruptive. It makes you less competent, less efficient and hinders the development of your true potential. Imaginary dream drags you to make you forget the realities of life, work, study, finances and other responsibilities.
7. Love recognizes defects; infatuation prefer not to see them.
Love recognizes the good qualities of others and to some extent idealized, but does not consider the other person is perfect. Admits mistakes, but prevails respect and admiration for the good qualities of the other person. The passion blinds you not see what is wrong and idealized to the point, which refuses to admit mistakes and defends against all criticism beloved. Admira over one or two qualities, to the point that minimizes the defects. Enables real love to love in spite of the defects and not close our eyes to reality.
8. Love controls the physical contact is exploiting infatuation.
True love helps the couple to be controlled in the romantic intimacy, as both are respected while voluntarily put limits on those impulses. Passion, however, demands much earlier intimacy. In contrast to the passionate couple, a couple who experience real love in the privacy is only part of the relationship. This is because fans are heavily dependent on physical attraction, and arousal leads to kissing and fondling advanced. Those who experience it first feel it is something special and assume they are loving. Unaware that their values, goals and beliefs may not coincide. If they marry only based on physical attraction, then discover that sexual interest declines and increase of disagreements.
Although true love includes physical attraction, it also stems from other factors and physical contact has a deeper meaning than pure pleasure. To the passionate, often becomes an end in itself. Dominates the pleasure to experience.
9. Love receives approval from family and friends, the infatuation receives disapproval.
If relatives or friends do not approve of the relationship, beware! If you are convinced it is a bad choice, probably right. Marriages that do not have the blessing of the parents have a high probability of failure. One researcher compared the happy married complaints with the divorced, and found that the latter were almost four times more likely to complain that their spouses had nothing in common with their friends. It also found that married couples were much less happy to be in trouble with her parents. If parents and friends have objections, beware! If they give their approval, go ahead.
time to time
If you analyzed your relationship, but still can not decide if it is true love, take time. Infatuation wants to accelerate the relationship. The emotions do not lead to common sense and try to push to make commitments later regret. Real love can survive the test of time, about two years of dating, to make sure you're well prepared for marriage. Time brings expertise and objectivity.
Each year thousands of couples come before the altar with shining eyes and promise eternal love and fidelity, without imagining that they are committing the biggest mistake of his life. What happened to their passionate dialogues, promises tender, lingering looks, kisses and whispers love inflamed?
Many fail to realize that one does not fall in love by accident. You who decide to love, that is, think, spend time and experience strong feelings for someone. Falling in love is easy and fun part of love. The next part is more difficult, since it involves taking a serious commitment to love an imperfect person unconditionally. Genuine love says "I love you even if they meet all my needs, I reject or ignore me, drive you insensatamente, tomes decisiones que yo no tomaría, o estés en desacuerdo conmigo y me trates injustamente. Te amaré tal como eres y para siempre”.
Este tipo de amor responde al don creativo de Dios hacia nosotros y puede ser plenamente disfrutado sólo dentro de la protección y seguridad del matrimonio. Somos capaces de amar solamente porque Dios nos amó primero. Amístate con él; entonces serás menos proclive a sufrir decepciones amorosas y tendrás la oportunidad de encontrarte con un amor mutuamente satisfactorio mientras vivas en la tierra.
Autor: Nancy Van Pelt
Fuente : http://www.jovenes-cristianos.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=456% 3Aiamor-true-or-fad-temporal & catid = 38% 3Apsicologia-relations & Itemid = 61Sorry it very long, but I did publish interesting ^ ^
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